{Being the Friend your Friends are. . . }

My Little Sister is MARRIED!

 And this post should be all about her. . .

 but I think I will have to do another one just for her! Because this has to be about ME!

Over the holidays The Mr. and I attended several parties. 2 of which. . . I haven't forgotten.

Although, the party I will be referring to tonight was just a "Girl Party"

( I probably wont ever share about the other one unless it is a rainy day and I just want to be depressed). 

I know we all know what "vibe" is. . . and this party had some sort of vibe. . . I couldn't

put my finger on it.  It was. . . odd. . . uncomfortable. . . different.

I know without a doubt that 5 of the girls there would definitely call 911 if my

house was a' blaze. . . but the others. . . not so sure.  You see. . . I need to know those things.

I need to know.  If I am going to put myself out there. . . I will know.

(I am certain this is soundin' strange, so I will move on. . . )

Needless to say, I left that night questioning myself.  

I left that night feeling. . . sad.

Where do I fit in?

(Knowing that there are certain places and times I don't want to "fit-in")

(Square peg, round hole. . . fine with me)

Who am I anyways?

Is there something wrong with me?

What do I stand for?

and

What is unacceptable?

and

What do I know for sure?

Who even liked me in that room?

Did I miss something?

Almost 2 months later, I still have some lingering questions, but I am feeling more confident. . .

I am a constant.  I am the same regardless of whom I am around.  I am not a facade. 

now

I make mistakes.  I do complete IDIOT things. Everyday.

but

I am real.

And. . .

When I was in a "911 moment" my friends came to my rescue.

 I needed them.

And. . . they came. 

A friend picked up my kids.

A friend offered to pick up my kids.

I had friends loaning me anything and everything out of there own homes.

I had friends come and decorate, move furniture, and clean.

A friend took pictures.

A friend did hair and make-up.

A friend attended and fluffed a wedding gown.

A friend loaned her very own gown and veil.

I had friends praying for my sister about her schooling and marriage.

And. . .

These were not my sisters friends (although they all have prayed and loved on her).

These are not my moms friends (although who couldn't love my mom?).

They were MY friends.

I just cant express how much I needed people to love and care, but also

 know that they do.  Do you understand my rambling mess?

Thank you, Lord, for the blessing of your calming reassurance.

Thank you, Lord, for the blessing of friends.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Thank you.

For as long as God allows me to live, I want a life full of loving, real friendships.

I hope and pray I can be the friend that my friends are to me. . .